Advice for Christmas visits when your loved one has dementia

For people living with dementia, little and often could be the way to happiness at Christmas.

Dementia experts at Care UK, say high expectations and an over-whelming sense of duty can end up making the whole family sad and stressed at Christmas.

People feel they have to visit their relative, whether in their home or in their care home, for the whole of Christmas Day. Alternatively, they may bring their loved one to their own home, away from a care home environment where they feel safe and comfortable.

Manage your expectations for Christmas day

Care UK dementia experts advise that people manage their expectations and guilt on Christmas Day. They advise people to think whether taking their loved one from their care home is always the right thing to do. That’s not to say don’t, but to recognise that Christmas at home can often be noisy and stressful, shorter visits often work well, remembering that what is good for one person is not necessarily good for another, everyone is uniquely different.

Care UK care homes have lots of planned activities, especially over the festive season. Your loved one will feel safe in a familiar environment with their friends. If they feel tired or not so well there are experts on hand to help them get some quiet time in their room whenever they fancy.

Contrast that with being in a family home they may not know anymore with lots of noise, movement, and excited children. They may struggle to hear the conversations or understand what is being said, depending on where they are in their dementia journey, and how often they see their relatives.

Experts suggest on the big day, you visit your loved one to chat, exchange presents, and talk about the day ahead. You could then follow-up with a phone call, so that your loved one knows that they are very much in your thoughts, and they can share news from the day.

If you aren’t sure whether your loved one would prefer to visit your home or stay at their care home, try to talk to them, and their care team about what the best option would be.

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